Is this year over yet?

toothWell, this has been a hell of a seven days. Last Thursday I had to go to the oral surgeon and have three teeth pulled. It wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. The surgeon and his team were awesome, from start to finish. If you are in Orlando and need oral surgery I highly recommend Dr. Scott Farber. They did everything in their power to put hubby and I at ease and when I went in I actually had no anxiety about it. Of course now that the work is done, this shit hurts. No pain pills because of the heart stuff, so I am in a lot of pain. So now I am bruised and suffereing.

12-9-13-karenThen yesterday I went to get my hair cut. I decided that I needed to hve it short for the surgery and recovery since I am going to have trouble maintaining it. Those of you who know me, know how long it took to get my hair long and the troubles I had keeping up with it. I am not going to be able to do that for a while, so I went short. Now, this may sound silly, but other than some breakdowns here and there, I have been okay about the surgery. So I am sitting in the chair yesterday and the little gal pulls myhair up in the rubberband and starts to snip. I teared up, got short of breath, and thought I might slip into a full blown anxiety attack. It was the first time I realized just how much I am giving up to get this LVAD and what it is going to mean. It scared the hell out of me. I managed to simmer down, but it was weird.

boccelliSo then yesterday I had to tell my friend that I could not go see Andrea Boccelli with her. She got wonderful seats and was taking me to cheer me up. I can’t tell you how much I was looking forward to it. I was going to see Boccelli for free. Well, because of the teeth and germs, infections, blah blah blah I am not able to go. I won’t get to see them (Tami, her sweet boy Austin, and Michael who just came home from Japan as a newly promoted Corporal.) This was a once in a lifetime opportunity and this damn heart has taken it away from me. It infuriates me, and makes me too sad.

But, such is life and I will man up and get over it. But it sucks and now I am crying again, so I will close. Not looking for any sympathy here, just needed to vent.

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3 responses to “Is this year over yet?

  1. Aww, you’re entitled to those tears, Karen. You’ve been through such a lot and to have that one enjoyment you’d been looking forward to taken away must be so disheartening. If the exchange is for many more (healthier) years ahead of you, then it’s well worth missing it. The short hair is cute and makes you look young/sassy.

  2. I love this post’s title. I kinda feel that way myself … the haircut looks radical! 😀

  3. Sorry you are going to miss the concert, and the visitors.

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